You’re right - this is very weird, and it’s not natural. Search for meaning is a psychic parasite, a form of mental illness. It’s not supposed to be that way.

In spirituality, they call it “ego”. It is basically your capacity to construct a mental image of yourself, along with moral values and “desirable” or “not desirable” characteristics. This image is based on nothing but judgments.

The root cause of this disease is society. Everyone does that, everyone has that image, so since early childhood you’re getting a lot of messages about “right” and “wrong”, “appropriate” and “inappropriate” behavior, and you’re generally punished for any deviation from what society considers “a norm”. It goes as far as boys being punished for crying and all children for expressing their sexual urges before “it’s time”.

Then by your adult years you find yourself engrossed in this mess and the question of the meaning of it all arises from a deeply masked inner desperation. The question really answers itself - if you have to wonder about the meaning of something, it has none. Behind the question there’s an underlying desire to destroy your self-image along with everything you thought gave your life “meaning” and revert back to how you came into this world - pure animal, no meaning, just life, existence. No living organism needs a meaning to live - life itself is enough, but the unnatural entity in your head does.

The process of stripping yourself of all “meanings” is exceptionally painful, but if you’re persistent and desperate enough, you will end up in the place where animals are - no meaning, just life. And just like an animal which is fed and warm is always happy, you are always happy, because basic food and shelter is not very hard to come by in the modern day and age.

That’s what they call “enlightenment”.