Is it a conscious choice if you decide to feel a certain way?

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Ultimately yes, but until it’s realized, adopting this view just makes you prone to blaming yourself or others for your emotions. You can only see it in the “rearview mirror” so to speak.

At the moment, you have no control over how you feel. If you try to control it, to escape it, you will just feel more of it. If you try to blame yourself for it, you will also get more of it. Best thing to do is just accept it and not look for any explanations for it. The sooner you accept it this way, unconditionally, the sooner it will pass. The more you fret over it, resist it, analyze it, think about it, resent it, try to escape it, etc. - the longer it will stay.

It feels counter-intuitive, but it’s true.